2018s Swimming… broke me… but it also saved me.
And this is in no exaggeration at all. From it’s melancholic opening Come Back To Earth, to its more bouncy acceptance anthem So It Goes, the album tells a story of someone checking in on themselves. It’s a personal album, so I’d understand if people don’t appreciate it as much as I did.
There’s these heaps of feel good energy, mixed with this sense of melancholy. Some points drown you in this silent feel good energy like Perfecto and Swimming. While some just go into the darkest depths of one’s conscious, loneliness. It’s like forcing yourself to notice the good, despite your mind trying to show you all the bad.
The guitars, the ethereal instruments, the warm sounds, the melodies, the lyrics and the overall tone of the album reflect that sentiment. He deep dives into his emotions trying to find the reason, while simultaneously trying to fix his mental state. Helping himself…
This album broke me not because it was great, but because it came at a point in my life where there were nothing but dark times. Self care, a song that randomly popped up on my recommended came at the perfect time.
So within the afternoon of my day, while staring at a wall near my own home, I opened my ears. I played it… and… I broke. He was speaking to me. He was speaking to the darkest depths of my soul. Like a little voice telling me, “It’s hard Sean, keep swimming.”
And from this album, I realized something. I wasn’t alone in this feeling. This feeling of being alone in the vast scape of the universe. Alone in a universe that actively tries to kill you, to break you. Everyone experiences it to some degree.
And despite his death shortly after, he left us with this beautiful message. Cope. Whether that’s through religion, drugs, money, power… something dammit. Just cope, even when you don’t have to. Like oceans, enjoy the beautiful low tides, and ride through the frightening tides. No matter what… swim.
Having said all that, I’ll leave you with this small thing.
When you’re fighting to keep yourself above water. When you feel like letting yourself go, and someone comes, trying to make you give up on yourself.
“Tell em they can take that bullshit elsewhere.” — Mac Miller
Keep swimming. For this miserable existence we all have, is all we have. What are the chances that you’d be sitting here, reading this? What are the chances that I would be writing this? What are the chances that the internet came into existence? What are the chances for our existence, in this universe actively trying to kill all life.
I give this album a nine. RIP Mac Miller.
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Please take care of yourself.